After (almost) 10 years in the books, I will be walking away from teaching this fall. I turned in my letter of resignation for the end of this school year today. What??! Well, let me backtrack.
Back in October, after 2 weeks of h-e-double hockey sticks- you know, everyone being sick, Stephen being gone 80% of those two weeks, and me not being able to work (or being called from work to have to pick up a sick child)... oh, and this was the ER-visit-with-Sydney-week. You can read all about this week
here. Good times.
After that second week, Stephen was driving home from the airport. I remember it vividly- I was home with one of the sick kiddos, he called, I burst into tears and told him I needed to stay home next year. I couldn't do it anymore, with him traveling and all of this being on me. (let me just preface this with I've never really wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. God bless them. It just wasn't for me. And Stephen never really wanted me to, either. It was just how we were.) But, I spat those words out, and his response? "Okay, let's talk about it!"
So we did. And we crunched numbers. We made some changes (like the electric car) that would help us save $$. We put as much into savings every month as possible. We found out Taylor got into the lottery-funded pre-K, so we don't have to pay for her to go anywhere. We had a plan for months. And now that plan is official!
We're definitely going to have to cut back. No $100 Walmart trips anymore, buying things off the list. Eating out will be a rare occasion. Trips? Who knows. My roots will be much longer next year. Clothes... well, who needs new clothes, anyway?
But... I will be able to cook every night. I can take the girls to and from school. I could be room mom, something I had to turn down this year. I can actually take the kids to do extracurricular activities. I can volunteer at the school and at our church. I can take Parker to the library and teach him things. I can be 100% at one thing- being a mom and a wife- and not be half-assed in everything I do. I can wear sweatshirts and workout pants and tennis shoes everyday. And no makeup! what what?
I will miss my school... well, I'll miss my co-workers. Kids come and go every year, and I will miss them, but that's going to happen if I'm working or if I'm not. I'll miss the laughs I have every day with my friends. I'll miss my guaranteed paycheck.
I won't miss the stress of teaching unmotivated 8th graders a topic 95% of them hate. I won't miss having the pressures of the "test" on me. I won't miss the lesson plans or the observations or the drama that occurs at schools. I won't miss the disrespect or the talking back I get everyday from my students. I won't miss the IEP or RTI meetings I attend, or the PLC meetings, or the faculty meetings bright and early. I won't miss the dreaded call from daycare on my cell phone, knowing something bad happened. I won't miss the last minute Chick-fil-a runs because I didn't pick the kids up until almost 6, the hubby is out of town, and we're all starving. I won't miss having only about 2 hours a day with my children. I won't miss being away from my loved ones to spend hours with kids who don't care.
So, here is to my new adventure. I may eat my words, but I really don't know if I'll ever be back to education. It's what I'm trained to do, but I just don't agree with it anymore. I don't agree with all the testing we have to do. These kids are tested to death! I don't enjoy it anymore. I've lost the love and drive I used to have for it. I would consider private school, but it would be hard to go back to public.
If I ever do something again, I want it to be simple. Stress-free. I don't care about the money. I just want to be able to function and support the most important people to me- my family.
